HAPPY-NF.mp3

Dear God please
Hear me out I know it's been a couple years
Since I've reached
Out and said hello I bet you're wondering
Why I keep
Obsessing on and stressing all the little things
When I should be
Living life and soaking up the memories
I know I've been selfish I have
No excuse to give you it's true
Hanging by a thread's how I live
I don't know why but I feel more comfortable
Living in my agony
Watching my self-esteem go up in flames acting like I don't
Care what anyone else thinks
When I know truthfully that that's the furthest thing from how I
Feel but I'm too proud to open up and ask you
To pick me up and pull me out this hole I'm trapped in
The truth is I need help but I just can't imagine
Who I'd be if I was happy
Yeah been this way so long it feels like something's off when I'm not depressed
I got some issues that I won't address I got some baggage I ain't open yet
I got some demons I should put to rest I got some traumas that I can't forget
I got some phone calls I've been avoiding some family members I don't really connect with
Some things I said I wish I would've have not let slip
Some hurtful words that never should've left my lips
Some bridges burned I'm not ready to rebuild yet
Some insecurities I haven't dealt with yes
I'll be the first to admit that I'm a lonely soul
And the last to admit I need a hand to hold
Losing hope heading down a dangerous road
Strange I know but I feel most at home when I'm
Living in my agony
Watching my self-esteem go up in flames acting like I don't
Care what anyone else thinks
When I know truthfully that that's the furthest thing from how I
Feel but I'm too proud to open up and ask you
To pick me up and pull me out this hole I'm trapped in
The truth is I need help but I just can't imagine no
Who I'd be if I was happy
Don't know what's around the bend
Don't know what my future is
But I can't keep on living in
Living in my agony
Watching my self-esteem go up in flames acting like I don't
Care what anyone else thinks
When I know truthfully that that's the furthest thing from how I
Feel but I'm too proud to open up and ask you
To pick me up and pull me out this hole I'm trapped in
The truth is I need help but I just can't imagine no
Who I'd be if I was happy
If I was happy
If I was happy